A Ukrainian Night’s Insomnia

Scene

A beautiful tropical island. No sirens. No bombings. Far off, half-naked girls drift like hallucinations.

Enter a FINANCIER.

(carries a polaroid camera and the latest issue of "Amateur Photographer")

FINANCIER

Where did I put my wallet?

Enter a FELON, a TECHNO-MESSIAH, and a PROPHET.

FINANCIER

(joyfully)

Ah! Mister President! Ah! Mister Genius of Progress! And—pray—who is this radiant soul?

FELON

A prophet. Tremendous guy. Really tremendous.

(He leans in, grips the TECHNO-MESSIAH with obscene familiarity.)

Lend me a billion of your billions. Just one. I’ll make it great.

TECHNO-MESSIAH

(raises an arm in a spasmodic salute, foams something chemical, collapses smiling)

FINANCIER

(Snaps a picture)

FELON

(loses interest in TECHNO-MESSIAH, looks around)

Do you have a wall here? We need a wall.

(He runs after a girl.)

Billions! Wall! Billions!

Enter OLD-TESTAMENT DEUS EX MACHINA.

Without ceremony, He destroys the FINANCIER: an eye, a tooth, ribs, neck.

FINANCIER

(collapses, dead)

OLD-TESTAMENT DEUS

(continues beating the corpse)

(Disappears.)

The PROPHET watches, genuinely amused.

Enter NEW-TESTAMENT QUEER DEUS EX ELECTRO MACHINA.

There is a faint electrical hum.

JESUS

(looking sadly at the corpse)

What a tragic suicide.

(Makes a selfie with the corpse. Lights a joint. Draws in the sand.)

FREE PALESTINE.

(Disappears.)

PROPHET

(laughing)

What a lovely place. I shall write a note on the moral superiority of my followers.

(Opens notebook. Notices a young girl.)

Ah. Later.

(Drops notebook. Runs after her.)

CURTAIN.

CURFEW.

NUCLEAR WAR.

BLACK HOLE MATTER.


Kyiv, February, 2026